I want to share that when I say “interracial” I mean two skin colors, races. Ultimately, we can care less that we are two different races(clearly we love and married each other). I do want to say that I respect others’ views on this. God created everyone and we are all created in His image. Sadly, many people have dark, hardened hearts that affect how they treat others. This can be seen by just the shade and color of people’s skin. I wanted to share my experiences so here you go.

Conversations can be difficult: Interracial Marriage

Some conversations are easy to have and some can be difficult. In today’s world, you get a lot of flack for loving the Lord and living it out. In some areas of the nation, you are not a favorite if your skin color does not match your spouse and/or partner. It is unfortunate but it is something we as people have been dealing with for many years. In my opinion, it should not be based on skin color but on your beliefs, morals, and values. As I have stated throughout BIBLEANDCAKE, your faith in Jesus and your relationship with him is the most important thing you should stand on and will be held accountable for. Just look at the Bible (God’s Word) God spells it out clearly for us. My relationship with Jesus comes first and then my marriage.

Marriage. I love it! I feel so blessed to have a husband like the one I have., Trust me, no one is like him. So as I write this, I know many questions may stem from interracial marriage. My blog is a place to have faith, family, and marriage discussions and posts. It is not a conversation many people have and if they do, they do. Great. These are my opinions and experiences I wanted to share to help others. Some of the things I may share here are pretty sad and some points may be so ridiculous that they are funny.

I wanted to share some points that some people, the majority of women may not know if they are not in an interracial marriage or are thinking and praying about their current relationship. These points should NOT deter you from your choices BUT shed some light on facts and realization that happens in the dark, fallen world we live in. No one talks about these things. Why? Not many ideas on why. But I wanted to share my heart and experiences because that is what BibleandCake is all about.

Interracial Marriage: Black woman and white man

Here are the facts according to my experiences… No one really talks about this but here we go: I am sharing from my relationship as a black woman married to a white man….

You married for his money
You are uneducated and could not get far so you married him for status & wealth
You are a SELL OUT to the black community
You are pretty much “white” ( I was called this throughout highschool and college)
You get stared at constantly when walking close together and/or holding hands ( the looks you get are as if they never seen two different ethnicities together)
Your children are NOT biracial BUT only “BLACK”.
Your husband/partner is educated and wealthy
Once in a while you will be asked by strangers “What are your children?” or “Are these your kids”? You just kindly smile 🙂
Depending on the location and/or area, you may be treated differently at a restaurant and/or resort UNTIL they see that your husband is a white male. Plenty of times ( I am NOT exaggerating, this has occurred sadly.)
Your children may be treated differently.
Awkward and inappropriate questions(in my personal opinion they are inappropriate) are asked by family members regarding your children because they are BIRACIAL.
Your children are so beautiful!
It teaches you so much about how God makes others different not just by their skin tone but spiritually as well.
It makes you stronger. I stand by this one despite the negative points we as a married couple have encountered. It builds you up and opens the door to how to pray better for those who have a hard heart and misunderstanding.
You will be treated DIFFERENTLY.
Some things may take some times to learn and unlearn depending on the cultures and ethnicies in the marriage. However, I think this could be something EACH marriage has to navigate whether you are involved in an interracial marriage or NOT.
Combat the STEROTYPES. This can be broken by digging into the Word of god and praying. Ask the Lord to change your heart and thinking. Work towards this on your part.

How to handle the negative things when you are in an interracial marriage….

I would say the biggest thing you as a couple needs to do is BLOCK OUT all the loud, negative noise and relationships around you. This can be also known as the world and how people can be very prejudiced and hateful. Stay anchored and grounded in the Bible ( God’s Word). Also, remember why you love your spouse( husband and or wife). Reflect on your marriage and keep Jesus at the center. Pray together as a couple. Make it a priority. Talk about the negative experiences you may encounter as a couple. I think this is imperative because it opens the door to a conversation between you and your husband. Share how that experience made you feel and how it made him feel. Jesus sees and knows everything.

My finals thoughts on Interracial Marriage:

My list is not exhaustive. Each relationship may have experienced different things. Overall, it is not something that should discourage you. Take what you experience and we can grow and learn from it. Also, some marriages and/or courting relationships may have different experiences because of the dynamics. It is interesting but you know what? It is a great thing! I trust that our marriage is all from the Lord. These experiences have not hurt or damaged us but only make us stronger, and have allowed for more growth in our knowledge and understanding. Thanks for reading!